here i come

Well, here I am, ready to blog my way towards better personal finance. Let me establish the basics.

I'm a law student at Law School in College Town, USA. I am in the midst of a personal crisis that has instigated a disastrous financial situation. Avoiding details here -- both for the benefits of anonymity and to avoid burdening others with navel-gazing about personal problems that are mostly all my fault.

Here's a rundown of my finances:

• Savings -- $203.58
  
• Checking -- $19.38 (I know!)
  
• Credit Card 1 – ($2,315.23), which equals $184.77 left
  
• Credit Card 2 – roughly ($2,500)
  

How did I get here? I'm ashamed to say…that I can't say. I have no idea. I'm educated, and got that way debt-free thanks to my parents. I've worked, I understand the value of things, and I used to think I was pretty good with money. No, wait – I was pretty good with money, back when I had it. I've recently broken my habit of eating my way out of personal discomfort or painful situations – only to find out that I spend. It's kind of like kicking the alcohol habit by sniffing glue.

I live on debt – not listed above is the $49,000 in Stafford loans I've taken (and apparently squandered) since August 2007. I'm trying to get past the panic of feeling like I need to pay off my debt now – that is just not going to happen. In fact, when I called Bank in a frenzy on Friday, the banker suggested that I apply for an expanded credit limit and continue to live off my cards until I graduate. That's not something I really want to do. On the other hand, I am limited in how I can make income. The ABA limits law students to a 20-hour work week – and it's ridiculous to think I have an extra 20 hours to work. Nevertheless, I have a job researching for Professor, and I'm trying to find ways to increase the hours I log. On average, it's been 4 a week or less, and at only $8 / hour.

Here's what I do have going for me. I have a scholarship that covers most of my tuition (please don't ask how I could have a scholarship yet be so dumb as to have less than twenty bucks in my checking account). With the loans disbursed at the beginning of January, I paid my rent through May, my car insurance through July, and a health insurance policy through the semester. I have the gift of a (mostly) reliable laptop that should get me through the rest of my degree. I have the grades to get a job that pays at least a pittance for the summer, or at the very least a relative-lawyer to beg for some paid drafting or something.

Here's what I have against me, per month:

• Car payment, $251.46
  
• Cell phone, $40
  
• Internet, $30
  
• Groceries, whatever I spend since I don't have a budget (I know!)
  

The car payment makes me most panicky. I bought a new car in spring 2007, when I was in a much, much different situation. At the time, I was reluctant to buy a new car…but like I said, my situation was different then. I thought about trading it in for a cheaper used one. However, I only have about $3800 of it paid off, and a car I could find for around that price would probably not be reliable or last for as long as my current vehicle will. Are those even valid considerations?

So that's where it is. I hope to get some snazzy tracking widgets up if I can figure out how. Maybe I'll even take a picture of my boots or something to post.